Hello World!
Tough times don’t last, tough people do. – Robert Schuller
My name is Ciana ‘Ci’, and I am an alcoholic. I’ve struggled with addiction for most of my life. As a teenager I experimented with drugs and alcohol but was always able to stop using drugs without any significant withdrawals or impact. Alcohol on the other hand, was not so easy.
I’ve maintained sobriety in the past for long periods of time but always given in to ‘one drink’. For those of us suffering from addiction you know that one drink is too many, and one more is never enough. I wanted this time to be different, I needed this time to be different, because no matter how much I lied to myself and tried to lie to everyone else, I could see the effects in every aspect of my life.
So, I went to rehab! I started journaling as part of my daily routine in rehab. I kept thinking about something I heard there that really resonated with me. I watched a recording of Brene Brown who said, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.” I don’t know if this blog will become someone else’s survival guide or just my journal to reflect back on later, I will be stronger for it either way.
May you be sober and happy always! Ci
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Another Monday
4.7.25 Today was pretty average. Another Monday I get to be sober and grateful for it when I lay my head down on my pillow tonight. Work was at a steady pace, and I was able to fit in some time for my continuing education classes. Bonus points for not having a burning desire to…
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Anxious And Avoidant
4.6.25 Oh how I missed Lady J. Since moving our counseling sessions to every other week, she took a vacation, leaving me to my own shenanigans, and two full pages of notes to discuss Thursday when we had our session. I was excited to tell her about my experiences and how I had handled life.…
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The Herd
4.5.25 I don’t think I’m alone when I say that I’ve always wanted to be a leader, on top, in charge, looked to for answers, superior. Does anyone wake up and think ‘average sounds good’? We’re taught from a young age to be competitive, to win, be the best of the best. It’s not always…