Hello World!
Tough times don’t last, tough people do. – Robert Schuller
My name is Ciana ‘Ci’, and I am an alcoholic. I’ve struggled with addiction for most of my life. As a teenager I experimented with drugs and alcohol but was always able to stop using drugs without any significant withdrawals or impact. Alcohol on the other hand, was not so easy.
I’ve maintained sobriety in the past for long periods of time but always given in to ‘one drink’. For those of us suffering from addiction you know that one drink is too many, and one more is never enough. I wanted this time to be different, I needed this time to be different, because no matter how much I lied to myself and tried to lie to everyone else, I could see the effects in every aspect of my life.
So, I went to rehab! I started journaling as part of my daily routine in rehab. I kept thinking about something I heard there that really resonated with me. I watched a recording of Brene Brown who said, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.” I don’t know if this blog will become someone else’s survival guide or just my journal to reflect back on later, I will be stronger for it either way.
May you be sober and happy always! Ci
-
Water You
1.31.25 Fucking technology. The older I get, the less and less I know or care about it. My homework from Lady J yesterday is to go back to my notebook and trusty #2 for journaling. Handwriting activates a different part of the brain than typing does. It also allows my emotions and feelings to flow…
-
Relationships
1.30.25 Keep your pants on…I’m talking about platonic relationships. Which, by the way, are just as fucking hard as sexual relationships! There is beauty in relationships even when they are only for a short season. There can also be pain. And no matter how short the season may have been, the pain may hurt very…
-
Peace And Quiet
1.29.25 First, I know you are all dying to know…I still have not folded and put away the laundry mentioned earlier this week! A few friends joked that they wanted proof I had done it, hard stop – 100% NOT doing it because I’m stubborn. And I don’t want the spare bedroom to get lonely.…
-
Sorry, I’m Not Sorry
1.28.25 I had to pause and think about whether or not to post this. I reminded myself that this is my soapbox and I’m glad I posted it. This is my journal where I document my thoughts and feelings to reflect back on. I know the struggle with sobriety is not easy to understand for…